I debated posting this..BUT..I just had to so it will be forever embedded in my pee little excuse for a brain. Once again, I have to ask how in the heck Mark ever leaves me alone with our children????
Before you go turning me in to CPS, let me preface this story with the fact that no little Cruzi Woozi's were injured in the development of this story.
Scene 1: Daddy climbs into hot tub and makes sure it is at a suitable toddler temperature (I had to add that so you wouldn't have another reason to turn me in). We didn't want to turn Big C into Coop Soup.
Scene 2: Mommy stays inside with Big C while we wait for the hot tub to be prepped. Big C is excited and looks oh soooo cute in his baggy swim suit (totally irrelevant to the story...but must be said because I can't get over how stinkin' cute he looks. Plumber crack and all).
Scene 3: Mommy quickly whisks Big C into hot tub with Daddy while Little C happily plays on the floor inside. It is very windy outside so we avoided any opportunity for Big C to have to stand outside and expose his plumber crack unnecessarily.
Scene 4: Mommy decides she ABSOLUTELY MUST have a photo to capture this precious moment of her boys chillin' in the hot tub. Then again, ANY moment with Daddy is precious. I feel the need to capture them all! Only 1 more week of Daddy time so I must capture every precious moment. EXTRA addition to the quick scene: Daddy rolling eyes that Mommy wants to take another photo. Scene 4 is abruptly CUT (sound of screeching needle being pulled from the record on the turntable) as Mommy slams door to condo shut so that the wind won't sneak in the house and chill Little C (I add that to show compassion as to why I would possibly think it was a good idea to shut the door). Daddy quickly exclaims, "you didn't just lock us out of our condo did you????"
Scene 4 turns into Scene 5, 6, 7, 8 and what feels like the END OF THE WORLD to Mommy. The Condo may as well been on fire with a rabid armadillo sitting beside my precious baby!!!! Oh My God, Oh My God. We have no keys, no phone, no visible neighbors and My Baby, did I mention the part about MY BABY?!?! I ring a couple of door bells..no answer. Truly, I didn't give anyone long enough to answer as I ran to the next door, and then the next...Daddy then calmly explains that he can see Little C through the window. YES, he's visible and YES, he's crying and NO, he's not choking on anything...GO TO THE HOTEL across the street and call the condo company. Side note: (just to add a little drama to the already drama filled scene). The hotel across the street is the, Stanley Hotel famous for inspiring Stephen King to write, The Shining(fitting).
Scene (what now feels like) 2,677: Mommy runs across the street through elk poop and snow in her socks to the hotel. The Princess, Angel, Mother Theresa, Penelope Cruz (just because I like her too) Fabulous Being of a Front Desk Woman let me use their phone and yellow pages. I called the Condo Company and the nice kid that answered the line said he was the only one on duty but he'd find someone right away to come over. It was 7:30pm on a Sunday night! I can't believe anyone was even there to answer! Especially during off season. But who cares about Rocky Mountain Rentals superior staffing and working hours! Long story short, someone came to our rescue in a matter of maybe 10 minutes (tops) and my baby was saved!!!!!!!
Final Scene (and an ending I wouldn't have wanted any other way): Mommy runs into Condo, swoops up crying baby into her arms and smothers him with kisses. Baby instantly stops crying like any other time he is finally picked up.
Deleted Scenes (that would be on the bonus section of the DVD release):
- Mommy bitting her nails while waiting for our rescuer and staring in through the window at her baby crying on the floor. Side Note: he's often crying to be held or picked up even when we're in the same room. But never before WHILE LOCKED INSIDE ALL BY HIMSELF!
- Daddy also looking in on baby while sitting in the hot tub.
- Big C telling Mommy, "don't be nerbous, Mommy"..."just ring our doorbell"..When did he learn the word nervous? And how does he recognize that emotion???? This conveys just how "nerbous" Mommy must have looked"
- Daddy lecturing Mommy about "YOU and your camera". All while remaining cool, calm and collected while Chicken Little ran around like the sky was falling.
No pictures where taken before during or after this incident. It just wouldn't have been appropriate since Mommy's camera was the cause of the whole ordeal.
Will this stop me from trying to capture precious moments with my family especially while trying to grasp the idea that Mark is going to miss so many moments while we are apart this summer? Probably not. I will put myself in check to make sure I'm actually savoring the moment rather than worrying about whether or not we have a picture to go with it.
There is truly only one picture that is worthy of closing this post.
Happy Baby! Can I keep him? Pleeeaaaaaseee!
Maybe one more photo. Mark politely informed me this morning on his way out the door that he hid our extra key under our doormat. I figured I'd post this so you wouldn't worry that this might happen again :).
Yes Mark, I really did take a picture of the key you hid under the doormat. It was photo worthy in order to "capture the moment".
3 comments:
Hidden key guarantees you will never need it!
Oh girl you are not alone. My kids actually lock me out - and I use the hide a key. It takes just one incident to make you realize how handy they are. My friend was locked out by her twins while wearing super skimpy clothes after a workout and had to call the fire dept. It is funny in hindsight - but not so funny at the time. I think you handled it well, elk poop and all.
Hahahahahahaha!!!! Amy, I should tell you right now that I am legally obligated by my profession to report any suspected child neglect..... Expect them at your house shortly. I told Jan that she had to read this. So funny....
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